July 26, 2006 at 8:25 pm (Uncategorized)

Did you ever wonder where you would be if your parents made different choices? My mother got married in 1964, she was 21. My father was 13 years older than her and had been married once before. He also had five children from his first marriage. I came along in January of 1966 and about two years later my mother left my father. Basically, from the story I got from my mom, she was a babysitter for me and my 5 siblings. My father was in the Army and somewhere else, that wasn’t Nebraska. Did I mention I was born in Nebraska, the Corn Husker state? My mother promptly moved back to Oklahoma and back into her parents home while me and my siblings did time in the foster care system. My mother had to find a job before she could get me back and the State did not want to hear any stories otherwise. After my mom retrieved me, my siblings remained in the system until my father came back, which I believe was sooner rather than later.

After a brief stay in Oklahoma, my mom’s two brothers phoned her and told her to get her butt to New Jersey where it was a far better place. My aunt decided to join my mother and away they went. I think the grandparents followed suit not long after. When I was almost 5 years old, my mother had my sister, an “oops” baby as I like to call her and we’ve been a great little family ever since.

When I was about 30 I met my father via letter, thanks to my one sister, his daughter who tracked me down. When I was 38, I met him physically. I had no bad feelings towards my father, my mother never said anything bad about him to me. Whenever I asked her questions, she always answered them truthfully.

The moral of the story is, if I would have stayed in the Corn Husker state would the following have happened:

1. working at Dairy Queen

2. bare foot and pregnant continuously

3. with about 10 kids

4. living in a trailer park

No offense to anyone, but I thank the Good Lord often for my mother’s decision and I often tell her that. I would definitely not have the sister that I grew up with and definitely not have the friends that I have. Do you often wonder where you would be if your parent’s made different decisions in life?

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11 Comments

  1. Anonymous said,

    Not only my parents decisions but my own as well. When you watch movies like Mr Destiny or family man, it gets you thinking. I also like unanswered prayers by Garth Brooks.

    Williams Brother

  2. Dick Small said,

    I was adopted, so had my biological parents not put me up for adoption, who knows where I’d be. I have no way of finding out my ethnic heritage. I kind of have no history, no past. Unfortunately the same can’t be said about my political career…. damn………….

  3. Teri said,

    Dick, you can always find out about your family history. Unfortunately your political career is in the crapper. Were you really adopted?

    Williams brother – I know just what you mean. Have seen both movies and always think the same thing. I try not to get too involved or I would drive myself nuts.

  4. Mainline Mom said,

    Um…short answer…nope! As far as my parents go, I’m quite happy with the way things turned out and it never even occurred to me to wonder otherwise. As for my life? Not really either…again, quite happy with how things are working out and don’t really care to wonder otherwise. Boring, I know. Would I like to be single again occasionally? Yes, but only temporarily.

  5. Chad said,

    I grew up in Allentown, PA and lived there for most of my life before moving to the south. I have to agree with your mom’s brother, the east coast is way better than good old Nebraska unless you are a avid Pheasant Hunter 🙂
    P.S. Loved the comment on if you stayed in Nebraska

  6. anne altman said,

    you’re one of the only people that praises new jersey and i like that

  7. kattbanjo said,

    absolutely! My dad put me in boarding school at ten years old. (yes Im serious) I was there until I was seventeen and graduated high school.It was lonely and hard to get through. I HATED him at the time for it but now I see if he hadn’t I would have dropped out and been pregnant and probably drug addicted. I am a college graduate and I know it’s because of his tough love. I regret that he died before I could tell him this, though. So I can totally relate to your thoughts dahling!

    (see, I can say something uncrazy sometimes! I prefer crazy though)

  8. Teri said,

    to my two favorite crazy ladies, Anne and Katt, welcome. Katt, I absolutely, 100% agree with you, crazy is better. I wish I could be like you though, yours is out there whereas mine is underlying and I only let it out on special occasions and under cover of darkness.

    Anne, I love Jersey and I HATE when people make fun of the State, especially those who drive through and think they know it all. Pisses me off big time.

  9. anne altman said,

    i have a feeling your native nebraskans make fun of it but it’s just a feeling. do you keep in touch with peeps there/go back and visit? i’ve never been to nebraska and would love to visit sometime. but just visit. need to be by a coast. . .

  10. Teri said,

    Anne, I was there about 2 years ago for a family reunion, that’s when I met my dad and one brother for the first time. It was in the Omaha area and there’s nothing but corn and soy bean fields for miles. My dad and most of my siblings actually live in Kansas and my one uncle still lives near Omaha. It’s okay to visit but the East Coast ROCKS so I could never leave!

  11. "that girl" said,

    i resemble that remark!!

    i’ve lived in one of those redneck states and yes to everything

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